When I was a lad

Author: My Son, The Greatest: The Best Of Allan ShermanAllan Sherman

When I was a lad I went to Yale
And I knew then that I would never fail
For I studied very hard and furthermore
I polished up the apple for the pro-fess-or
(He polished up the apple for the pro-fess-or)

I polished up the apple so frequently
That soon I had a phi beta kappa key
(He soon had a phi beta kappa key
from polishing the apple very frequently)

On graduation day I made a stop
At a very exclusive clothing shop
I opened up a charge account and asked them for
The best gray flannel in the clothing store
(The best gray flannel in the clothing store)

The suit was a part of a great intrigue
For it proved I was a member of the Ivy League
(It was part *beat* of *beat* a great intrigue
For it proved he was a member of the Ivy Leauge)

I wore my new suit and a sincere tie
And for my first job I did apply
A job in an advertising agency
Sharpening the pencils of a big VP
(Oh, he honed a lot of pencils for a big VP)

I sharpened all the pencils so pointedly
That soon I was a member of the agency
(He sharpened all the pencils so pointedly
That soon he was a member of the agency)

I kept my ears open and my big mouth shut
And I learned all the agency scuttlebutt
I learned who was going out with whom
And who had the keys to the powder room
(And who had the keys to the powder room)

The key to the powder room you see
Is the the key to the power of the agency
(The key *beat* to the powder room *beat*
Is the key to the power of the agency)

I worked real hard for the dear ol’ firm
I learned ‘most ev’ry advertising term
I said to the men in the dark gray suits
“Let’s run it up the flagpole and see who salutes”
(Let’s run it up the flagpole and see who salutes)

I ran it up the flagpole perfectly
So now I am a partner in the agency
(He ran it up the flagpole perfectly
So now he is a partner in the agency)

Now I have a big office at the end of the hall
With very fancy carpeting from wall to wall
I keep my mouth open and I keep my ears shut
And I have a little palace in Connecticut
(Yes he has a little palace in Connecticut)

So I thank old Yale…
And I thank the Lord….
And I also thank my father who was chairman of the board
(yes he’s grateful to his father
yes he’s grateful to his father
yes he’s grateful to his father who was chairman of the bo-ARD!)

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